the first painting of the new year.

'tis the season for resolutions, no?
i don't generally make any formal goals for the new year but i can say that i have a bit of work to do to recover from a brief stint of unhealthy lifestyle habits. it's amazing how quickly our bodies can fall out of shape from neglect and over indulgence.
the little beauty above happens to be my first quick painting of the new year. she's on her way into the mail to a friend on the west coast.

happy birth-month to me.

it seems that the universe has so graciously gifted me a category 3, threat-level-orange cold virus for my birthday. i have spent much of the last three days in a recuperative hibernation, thinking often of the evolutionary perfection of viruses.
alas, i do seem to be coming around. today i have the glorious feeling that only comes after being sick for some time; the faint glow of "normal". it's startling how easily we forget the gift of good health!

getting to zero.

today is World AIDS Day.
beginning in 2011 the World AIDS Campaign & the United Nations theme is "Getting to Zero", an effort to move towards eliminating AIDS related deaths.

think that's not possible? well it is. HIV/AIDS is a completely preventable disease, but because it is so closely related to "taboo" behaviors we don't speak openly about it and let it continue to spread.

we can all stop it.

don't think you're at risk? it's probably not true.

never been tested? go and get it done. unless you've delivered a baby in the US since the mid-nineties, you have not been tested without explicitly consenting to it, which means you signed a form. HIV testing is not part of routine medical exams.

most of all, be aware, be compassionate and be informed.

tidbits.

today was our first day at our new, purple & yellow fitness club.  it was sort of like being the new kid at school.  after two years at the same gym, i felt a little like a lost puppy.  i can honestly say that after only one visit, it was the right choice.  our old gym was turning into a bit of a dump.  the equipment was in poor repair and the bathrooms were far from clean.  most importantly, the new gym costs 60% less than we had been paying.
on another note, i put some small original paintings in the shop today.

meatout.

if you weren't already aware, this weekend marks the 25th anniversary of the great american meatout. 
honestly, i am not doing anything special, mostly because i've been a vegetarian for about 20 years.  of the many types of vegetarianism, i adhere to a lacto-ovo vegetarian diet.  i haven't knowingly eaten a meat product since freshman year of high school.  while i do consciously prepare vegan meals, i have never tried to completely convert to this type of diet.
as the years have passed and i've become a little less teenage angsty, being vegetarian has morphed into a normal part of my life.  i rarely point out this personal, ethical choice to others and am not on a mission to preach the vegetarian way of life.  the only times it is brought to my attention as out-of-the-ordinary is by non-vegetarians, which are most of the people in my daily life. 
my non-scientific observations suggest that the general public is a bit more educated about vegetarianism than it was two decades ago, but often people have a visceral reaction to meeting vegetarians.  i still get comments about how i can't possibly be getting enough protein.  (what am i, some kind of body builder?  this is one of my trigger statements as it shows people's lack of understanding of nutrition...or it suggests that they subscribe to that whole adkins phenomena.)
i can always tell when someone doesn't know many vegetarians (or perhaps they only know vigilant preachy ones?).  we can be eating together and they will ask, "does it offend you that i eat this [insert non-vegetarian food item here] in front of you?".  it does not offend me when other people eat meat, because it is only fair for me to assume that they made an educated decision to do so.  while i feel that eating a vegetarian diet is ethically and environmentally responsible, other people can (and do) disagree.
ultimately, it's important that people are aware of the impact of their choices.  my knowledge of the meat industry practices and it's inhumanity are too much for me to overlook.  i will not personally support those activities when i can eat satisfying, healthy and delicious meals without meat.
anyone else out there vegetarian?  do you ever get quizzed or lectured and if so, how do you deal with it?

a little information.

they say that a little information can be dangerous. i agree. you know when you learn something and you wish you had never found out about it? then you can't stop thinking about it...
what...just me?
okay, whatever.
anyway, this is what happened to me earlier this week when i read this article on treehugger. mercury in mascara? really?!?
and to those of you who don't wear mascara, please stay with me. the article links to skin deep, a site maintained by the environmental working group. skin deep is a database of cosmetics and their safety based on the known (i.e. listed) ingredients of the product. the products listed vary from eyeshadow to baby care items to toothpaste and shampoo.
those that know me would understand that i am not a big cosmetics freak. my makeup regimen is limited to a little mascara, but i do have a minor obsession with lip balm. there is a whole section of lip balm listings and most of it is NOT pretty!
the site is easy to navigate. you can search by typing in the items you currently use or you can just browse the database. be careful though, you may wind up throwing out the contents of your bathroom!

a digression.

recently, there's been increased MSM coverage of health care reform, or "obamacare" for the conservatively bent. the crappy state of the US health care system has been a concern of mine long before obama's election and i bristle at the mention that i have just jumped on the bandwagon and "drank the obama kool-aid". many folks have been advocating for reform, more specifically a single payer or *gasp* a federal health care system long before the elections even started. the truth is, obama isn't even advocating for single payer, which is a big disappointment to me.
those who are so defensively against this type of reform must have stable jobs, decent incomes and have never been seriously ill and denied coverage. with fifty million uninsured people in our country there is an undeniable problem. beyond that, just having insurance in the US doesn't mean that your serious ailment will be covered when you really need care. what if you lose your job? or what if you have a crappy job that you "have" to keep to maintain your (likely minimal) health insurance?
the for-profit health care system favors the insurance and pharmaceutical companies who are trying to increase their dividends, not the health and well-being of people. our current system doesn't promote preventive care, only illness treatment. i know many with insurance who skip annual visits because they can't afford the co-pays or are afraid of needing follow up appointments, only to end up at with a more urgent issue later.
i'm fed up with all the myths and mis-truths about what a single payer health care system will bring. if it's gotten to the point that protesters are hanging effigies of health care reform advocates, then this has become yet another issue with which you can announce your political affiliations. unfortunately, this reform should be about the health of humans and not about politics. can we really afford to do nothing and what will be the result if we remain scared of change?

just wear it.

seriously though, it's important 'cause you just don't know who has what, if they know they've got it or if they just don't want to tell you what's really going on.

(maybe) trivial dilemma.

i am usually not the type of person to ignore information that may be detrimental to my health. but i seem to have been able to tune out the news about BPA almost entirely until now.
you see, adam and i drink out of #7 bottles on a daily basis. it is not uncommon to see me carrying a 32 ounce nalgene bottle of water.
it all started pragmatically; we used nalgene bottles when hiking and backpacking because they are tough and light. but now we use them daily to replace water bottles. i have one by my bedside every night. adam and i have our personal favorite bottles; decorated with stickers and scarred by repeated hiking abuse. it's not too much to say that we have become emotionally attached to our nalgene bottles.
but we have used them to brew tea and coffee. and we have had some of these bottles for many years.
i admittedly stuck my head in the sand when i first heard about this BPA business, but now i can no longer avoid it. "endocrine disruption" doesn't really sound fun and i am sort of attached to being able to use my brain.
have these nalgene bottles been compromised forever by their exposure to hot water? that would mean throwing them away and this seems pretty wasteful.
how do i know that those "BPA free" bottles really don't have BPA in them? plastic "BPA free" bottles still have #7 on the bottom. i'm not trying to be cynical, but it's not like consumers haven't been lied to before. plastics is an industry after all.
there is "information" to suggest that BPA exposure is not harmful. BPA is on the inside of most of our canned foods, right?
certainly the FDA wouldn't allow our food to be corrupted...
oh wait, maybe i'm thinking of canada.

respectful sacrifice.

as a father's day 'gift' to adam's dad, we agreed to attend his regular saturday spinning class tomorrow.

the thing is...it's at 7:30 AM.

have i mentioned that i AM NOT a morning person???

waking up by 7:30 AM is a struggle...let alone pedaling at 500 miles an hour...for an HOUR !!!

this cause for significant concern people....

what i've been doing while not blogging:

• going to physical therapy in addition to stretching, icing and exercising. i happened to have pulled a muscle in my right thigh while running. and now i have tendinitis in my hip. and my right ass muscle is exceptionally tight (not in the good way). it's super fun stuff.
• cutting down trees.
• planting the vegetable garden.
• listening to music.
• working on my mojito skills. we have a plethora of mint in our yard. it's the best use i can think of.
  
• visiting my beloved father in virginia beach. pretty conveniently coinciding with a memorial day vacation.
• going to this place to listen to our friend Brian play with his band. did you know that you can still smoke in bars in virginia? i forgot how gross that is.
  
• taking the lewes-cape may ferry.
  
• getting stuck in traffic in new jersey. i mean the ENTIRE LENGTH of new jersey. from south to north. i swear i try not to dislike new jersey, but it is so hard.
  

not funny.

i was just called by glens falls hospital.
the blood draw they did this morning will need to be repeated. the guy gave me a bunch of medical, phlebotomist language for why it can't be used. but all i heard was "more blood".
i nearly cried.
i am now scheduled for a special appointment with a lead phlebotomist because i am a "hard stick".
~sweet~

a little lag time.

i thought after my self-affirming 5K post, i would remind myself of my ongoing weaknesses. you know, we all have a myriad of different variants to our personalities.
today, my logical adult case manager persona finally convinced my totally petrified toddler persona to follow up on some standard and rather unexceptional health monitoring. maybe you recall my not so recent annual physical where i was given a lab order to have blood drawn.
i just got that order completed today. and i had to be brought to the hospital to have it done. just as though i was a true toddler.
there was nervous laughter. there was enough anxiety to fill a swimming pool. and there was one poor phlebotomy tech named jessica who had to deal with me. props to her for distracting me enough to not notice that she blew my vein on the first try. because if i did notice, i may have broken the world sprinting record getting the hell out of there.

progress is...

when you think a 30 minute 5K is a light day.

it's about time.

today i joined a gym.
really, really overdue.
i think today was the first day in a long time (mmmm....probably almost 10 years) that i have actually "worked-out". that is, exercise for the sole purpose of exercise. i don't count hiking and backpacking in that category because i do these things because i enjoy them.
i am hoping to learn to enjoy the gym again. right now, i'm still in the newbie, intimidated phase. i'll get over it.
as long as i keep going.
which i believe i will. if for no reason other than the one year contract i had to sign.
wish me luck!

hmmmmppppff.

as usual, michael moore has made another piece of successful propaganda. it just happens that i agree with what he has to say.

i work in and around the health care industry and struggle to assist very ill people to negotiate it. it is not set up to help you. i can give hundreds of examples of how the health care industry makes accessing care difficult or impossible. i wouldn't have a job if it were easy.

WAD

World AIDS Day is december 1st.

things you can do:

1) get tested. has it been over a year? don't assume that your doctor automatically completes this screen. in the US you have to sign a release to have it done.
today you can know your results in 20 minutes and often you don't need to give any blood. testers can now take an oral swab.

2) be educated. know your risk behaviors and be proud of how you protect yourself. make changes if you can. talk to friends and partners.

3) reach out. find a local AIDS service organization and volunteer. give money if you can't give time. is there a world aids day demonstration in your area? go out and see what's going on.

4) stay informed. look outside your own life and know how this disease is ravaging others in your country and around the world.

5) watch a movie:

who punched me in the arm?

damn flu shot.

annual physical.

i went to the doctor today.
actually, that deserves more detail. i go to doctors appointments many times a week, but they are other peoples doctors appointments. this one was for me. and that is an expressly different experience.
i got my first ever flu shot. you would think i would have the insight to have gotten the vaccine in past years, considering i am always telling people how important they are. you see, i am not a fan of the hypodermic needle. they give me the heebs.
at least i wasn't getting blood drawn. i swear i can feel the blood being pulled out of me. unfortunately i did leave the doctors with a blood draw order.
i must be the only patient that ever asks how many tubes will likely be taken. the higher the number the more likely i am to postpone the appointment.
uuuuggghhhhh.